somewhere over the rainbow

2011-11-27T02:03:00.000-08:00

Long time no see everyone!

I have been rather happy last few months! For no particular reason! but I like my current life now! The pharmacy is still a busy madhouse, and I have rude patients every now and then (including drug abusers) but I am still happy. Maybe everyday I still have many nice patients and am thankful we establish a friendship within the last few months! And I got a good rest every weekend and I am grateful for that.

I fell in love w manicure recently. It has been my hobby few years back but I gave up thanks to lab work in school. well actually i also cannot apply during work but i cant be bothered. :) And Ilove signing up groupons for manicure!

I am so looking forward to 2012! Going to Japan for a long holiday and Hanoi for a short one! And all going to take place in the first half year! Happy!! :D

And year end bonus is coming!!!

2011-08-31T08:07:00.000-07:00

one of my dear colleague's mother passed away recently suddenly, and she refused to say the reason. she wasnt someone really close, but i really tot i was lucky to meet someone like her at work. she has a heart for patients and students, was a good farmer and teacher.

it was so sad to see her crying non stop at the wake. for she is someone who is normally so cheerful. even once when she was shouted at by one male patient, she didnt even drop a tear. and the male patient alr made someone cried earlier one. so it was really upsetting to see her cry everytime each visitor comes. and her eyes were so swollen.

i cant help her much except to hope she gets up again and be strong, for she still has a long way to go. meanwhile, i am really afraid that i might lose my loved ones anytime too. dun u tink this is so scary? the thoughts of how my uncle passed away suddenly last year came back, and i cant help but feel life is really fragile.

2011-08-28T03:54:00.000-07:00

working has been so tiring recently i am thinking of a change again. it is seriously a manpower shortage over here, why are we not doing anything!! Rush rush rush from monday to friday! I dun like such hectic working life. :(

Locum at AnE is good. Money is good! Am happy working there. I want to earn enough money so that I can faster clear my uni fees then think of my next step in life.

2011-08-15T00:11:00.000-07:00

my first official leave day as a pharmacist today. chill chill chill. =)

so i was really busy last week cause my friend from US came for a visit. it was a good thing cause to everyone of us, it was a chance to get together again. I get to see the guy classmates, and of cos my sec school eye candy. He looked the same, and it was amusing when he told me his younger sister is in my course. Gosh, I cannot imagine if she turns out to be my student next time. Thanks Cat for coming back, and I hope she do well in her phd in harvard. Gosh this seems like an impossible path in my life. :(

and happy birthday lab partner! (:

2011-08-12T10:02:00.000-07:00

every now and then, the tot of leaving and starting anew comes in. and i got disturbed. below are some reasons:

1) i cnt stand the working hours. i am becoming more n more anti-social cause i am so tired and everyday i feel so weary after work. maybe i worked too hard, but i prefer to give 100% at work cause i am dealing with people's lives. because i am so tired, i am abit sick of gg out. esp if its consecutive days.

2) i am getting sick and i am sick of not able to get mc. as in u know u can still function, but not at the best. so whats the point of gg to work? its so dangerous

3) i seriously think my work is hell-like. enough said.

4) i am so careless. ever since that error i committed, i live in the fear everyday i did sth wrong. everytime someone called my name, i have this fear. u know errors are sometimes inevitable, but we cant use this reason in my job. cause someone will get hurt if i made an error.

but i really enjoy my job because i get to make alot of meaningful interventions and counselling. even if nth was made, i made meanings to the use of the medications. i never forget my patients, and i always look forward to seeing them. not tat i am cursing them, but they are on long term meds, and i hope to see them coping well.

so do u think i should leave?

2011-08-02T08:38:00.001-07:00

do you remember what u used to say last time?

2011-07-30T23:06:00.000-07:00

we got a party coming up to welcome the new pre-regs and to celebrate alot of random stuff, and guess wad! I(and my fellow ex-pre regs) have to organise! Well, even though i am not the head of the organising team, i am sick of gg for meetings and coming home to do slides for the party! >.<

And i got one extra work to do now - ward check. duper unhappy. =(

i was so tired on friday that i immediately went to arrange a massage session the next day - saturday! thank god i am silly enough to waste that money, cause i think it was well-spent! Now, am thinking of the package ... hmmm.

And do u think i should go for the facials too? >.< i am so stressed over the waiting time at my workplace i got acne outbreak. gosh i dun even have that during viva. or should i go see a skin doc in the workplace cause i got staff benefits anyway?

i keep telling myself i shouldnt worry as much cause i am only getting that small amt of pay, but i cant help feeling irritated when people are not working as hard or slacking during work. just kill me.

the nice boss is leaving. we had a dinner last friday tgt, with the rest. i could see he was very tired. take good care of urself!

2011-07-24T08:16:00.000-07:00

I haven been feeling good recently, cause I am very tired. acute fatigue syndrome i guess. woke up with a very bad sore throat the day before, and had been sneezing non stop and had a massive headache this weekend.

sometimes i wonder am i jus lazy, or this job is too mentally challenging for me? trust me, outpatient is not as easy as what the outside world thinks. i gave myself this challenge few mths ago, and true enough, i am struggling.

i am concerned abt the waiting time, i know what this all means. i want to do well too, but it doesnt feel nice sometimes when i feel i am the only one fighting for it. what does teamwork means?

i think i am evil. recently, i have been rather inpatient with some of the newbies packers. come on, i really think we need to be initiative! i am such a horrible person right.

i signed up for a volunteer programme. hopefully they find my minimum knowledge useful hehe. =) need to do some good karma to balance off the bad stuff i do(to those newbies) and my occasionally rude behavior at some csc and foreigners neh neh patients!

2011-07-14T09:11:00.000-07:00

I wasnt feeling very well in the whole of last week. Think I didnt had enough rest since my bdae and then the monthly thing came .. so it became sth like chronic plus acute fatigue. but i didnt take mc!!! Hehe really pray I didnt have any errors done these few days.

i am happy with what i have now. so thankful that i wont ask for more. one step at a time. =)

2011-07-04T07:07:00.000-07:00

Emo is contagious!

so stay away from me.

I hate admin work. how come open one shop must do this do that. mus clear no show, must print this print that .. yet i still get the same pay. still need to see waiting time. Grr am upset, plus i got no bonus.

2011-06-19T02:55:00.000-07:00

I haven been having a good time at work as I am not used to people not giving in to me OR scolding me for no reasons. There are some things I am not happy, but I guess this is working. Too bad my boss is not my parents hahha. This is part of learning, and I see myself growing up to be a better person who knows how to understand people. I see my clinical knowledge going down (sadly), but I guess I dun regret my choice. But maybe one day when I see a good opportunity comes along ... but well.

But thank god for this job that I am able to chill n nwa every weekend like how I once dream to have, and buy the stuff I want to get. But then, I am not rich hahha.

And pre-reg is so good. First, you get to see your friends. Second, there is a reason for u to read up. Seriously, now I am too lazy to even find my BNF. And I think this is really unhealthy. I seriously miss pre-reg. and at least things will more innocent then. :(

Oh ya, recently got a special gift! IPAD 2!!! yay finally i am faster than pp in getting such high tech stuff. It took me n my sister some time (2 weeks?) to realise it is ipad 2 and not ipad! HOHOHO KUKU! >< So life now is playing angry birds n fishing after work. still dun have data plan, so can only surf net at home.

But, I wonder why everyone is getting ipad. it is sth cool, but i wont die without it. but it is so expensive, i may die buying it.

i have friends who are gg US in the next few mths, i am very worried for them. I am very worried abt terrorist. even though i am quite excited cause u can help me get my dream kate spade bag, i am still worried. so my friends who are gg there, pls be safe.

2011-06-07T10:11:00.000-07:00

i made a promise to myself to whine lesser this year cause i should be more mature, and i do find whining very childish. but just for tonight, i just wanna whine.

2011-06-06T09:14:00.000-07:00

To my farm friends, rx means Prescriptions. But to me, rx has a special meaning hahah cause my friend is called rx too!

This post is specially dedicated to rx. Happy birthday!! :) One day late but never too late. :)

Please pray that I have a smooth week ahead.

2011-06-05T06:28:00.001-07:00

i cant believe wad happened today omg!

2011-05-30T07:19:00.000-07:00

today sth really bad happened in the farm, and i felt rather gulity cause i am the last one in contact. :( But I think this incident brought everyone closer.

I will pray hard tonight for you.

2011-05-29T07:24:00.001-07:00

today i went to a far far away place ... choa chu kang! Argh really really far. but quite cool to see the turf club!

i dun know how many of my friends still read this blog .. but i was recently on CNA for 3.5 seconds! I attended my farm pledge ceremony and somehow i was on tv. not that i was the best few, but because of my surname which starts with a B, i was at the first row LOL. Dun dare to put on fb cause it is still AA, but i think u guys should see it!

one day i aim to be that lady which appeared from the start. >.<

link: http://www.channelnewsasia.com/video/index.php?vidfile=110526_sg_pharmacists.flv. catch it before it gets removed down! ^^

2011-05-22T05:00:00.000-07:00

there is a part of me wanting very badly to go for a holiday .. and it doesnt help when i know i have some spare cash left (not alot, just that this small sum of spare cash appears after i got registered and i got a pay rise! Awww!)

My friend jus came back from holiday, I have friends who are gg for holidays soon, I have friends who want to go holiday with me! Not alot for the last group though, luckily. ^^ So you see how hard is it to stop thinking abt holidays!!

I still dun think I am very rich now. I think that one will always remains a dream (yes, I want to be very rich and count my money everyday) I do get to count thousands of money everyday NOW but thats because I am working as a cashier at my pharmacy for my private patients. I love the smell of money!!! But of cos it isn't nice when I have discrepancy in the accounts. =( well maybe it is destined I can only count Tens of money.

A short getaway is good. To make me think what I really want. What I really feel n think. I seem to forget why I choose to go OP now, and sometimes I do feel disturbed. But I realised I should give myself some time to settle down. =)

Okay I got a new goal next month. I am not gg to take any cabs next month! ^^

2011-05-17T07:43:00.001-07:00

In the last 1 month, my parents caught (but found by me) 3 cockroaches in my bedroom! This is really scary cause where do all these creatures come from? Now I am really scared and I dun dare to sleep on my own bed sometimes. Sometimes ... I even dreamt of them .. and I always have thoughts they are crawling on my bed ....

Should I call for a pest control man to come my room? Wonders if they take in such business ...

2011-05-15T05:05:00.001-07:00

Love weekends nowadays! I am glad I finally have the opportunity to nwa during weekends like my other friends. Though it is short, but sometimes we know it cant be too long otherwise we forget how to go back to work!

Having this group of preceptorship n poly students in the pharmacy now. I finally understand how the preceptors feel. Those dispensing errors ... Well as much as I catched many of them, I am really worried I miss out some and patients end up suffering. but on the other hand, I just went through what these students are gg through now and I really hope to let them achieve what I once hope to achieve too. And its really inspiring to see them working so hard. ^^

Pss sessions are good for 1 thing. They are one reason to catch up with friends and to know everyone is still alive. Nowadays, I seldom see everyone .... :( even in my own hospital, it is hard to meetup too.

Sometimes I have problems dealing with things at work, but I think this is part of growing up n doing BIG things hur. Learning, still learning ... these admin skills, these PR skills. You know recently I need to do cashiering ... Well as lame it may sound, it is really not an easy job. esp to count money at the end of the day ... reminds me of my piggy bank. But I am glad I did it.

I am glad to have this buffer period now before I go on to the next stage of life.

bad news ... gf in hospital again. and sister is in bkk.

2011-05-14T10:37:00.000-07:00

why did things progress till like that? :(

2011-05-09T07:43:00.001-07:00

today, work was really busy and i happened to be the open shop pharmacist. Challenging! But I am glad I have nice colleagues except .....

Don't know why the whole day i keep thinking of cat fight. Damn random. ><

2011-05-04T06:16:00.001-07:00

Hello!

I just want to write a note here to say i am really happy with my life now. =) Life as REGISTERED pharmacist as been really meaningful, I like talking to patients and educating them on their medications. At times, i feel i am still so incompetent to help them and feels really gulity. But i will work hard .. just that the motivation to read up is so minimum after the training.

I am happy with the working hours since i often start at 930 or 10am, no more squeezing in the trains! and the staff there are really nice, some patients are bad but i dun remember them at the end of the day. the happiest thing is, when patients come to u and say hey i remember u!!

and i seriously love the work life balance. nwa in the weekends ... omg so many long weekends recently ... ^^

however, i was on 2 days MC recently. damn, not even 1 mth as a pharmacist yet. >< been really sick ever since dun know why (if u read my blog). I am gg to stop drinking iced coffee and milk tea until i get healthy again!

i hope my passion and love stays on till then.

2011-04-18T06:01:00.000-07:00

aiyoooo i am sick again. cui.

2011-04-11T06:30:00.000-07:00

In case u think I died or MIA-ed again, nah ... I am back again.

2 weeks as a real farmer .. today started out in the brand new farm! ^^ Come to my hospital and I will bring u to my new workplace, awesome. It looked like those hospitals in TV dramas, i was like WOWWWW until the staff tot I was a patient (cause I wasnt in white coat) Then all patients were telling me how nice my farm is, as if that is opened by me! Okay I will tell boss. ^^

Last week was so tiring I was rather upset with myself. Work sleep work sleep work sleep, even meals werent well taken. But I am glad I had a good start this week. :) and I saw more familiar faces, some of my pre-reggers are back!! And I like my new colleagues, they are so funnyyyy!

And big boss was standing in front of me watching me dispensing, and he was giggling away non stop. I was so scared I ran away after dispensing, and he came and asked me how is my tioman trip. Hmph.

May will be a good month.

2011-04-04T06:14:00.000-07:00

I am duper tired after my first day of work as a real farmer. >< Somehow the responsibilities all look heavier now, the technicians come to u for help hehe.

No words can describe the joy I have when I see my staff pass this morning! After such a long journey .... Too much I was the only one in the HR department.

Nice colleagues! :)

2011-03-31T05:30:00.001-07:00

I am having such a good life this week that I am feeling bored sometimes. ><

2011-03-28T20:26:00.000-07:00

Pre-reg training finally ended! And I jus came back from tioman and bangkok and pattaya! And I am on leave this whole week! Awesome life! First time thinking why time passed so slow, why tudou stream so fast, the quiet and slow pace, no longer fearful about waking up late, dun need to worry about what to eat for lunch...

Tioman trip was not bad, like the sea alot. But not the mosquitoes. bangkok trip was once a lifetime thingy lol, like the massage sessions and the nwa coffee sessions every night. And I like the budget we all have! ><

Starting work as a real farmer next week. I look forward to a more fulfilling and challenging life ahead. And a richer life LOL.

2011-03-16T07:54:00.000-07:00

Was having dinner with this guy and some friends, then he ordered a plate of veg salad and placed in front of me ... asked me to eat ... from this, you should know this can never be my close friend cause i am a carnivore.

then after that, i was telling this guy i lost alot of weight in pre-reg. and i really meant it, and i am happy i gained some weight back cause otherwise i will be classified as malnutrition/catabolin based on ESPEN guidelines.

I was quite shocked when this guy told me okay at most ur BMI dropped from 25 to 23 ... you dun look like you got a BMI of 21 now.

Is he trying to say I am still very fat???

Anyway he was my big boss, so I cant say anything but agree with him. -.-

2011-03-13T07:11:00.000-07:00

I got so upset just now i cut my own hair! ^^ Now it looks nice so am happy! :)

My prereg log book is gg liao. SOS pleaseeeeeee!!!

2011-03-13T04:02:00.001-07:00

i am really lost for words when i saw those words. i will never forget what just happened.

2011-03-12T13:15:00.000-08:00

The cough is really irritating. And I lost my voice today, really bad day. came home to sleep from 9pm to now, which is 4am. and here i am, trying very hard to START my learning log book. someone jus kill me to reduce my sufferings!!!!

okay i decide i should not any more fried food this week so that my cough will get well then i can enjoy my tioman and bangkok trip! so, no mac breakfast tmr cause it will contain my fav hash brown.

Anw, this morning, i jus eaten 2 plates of fried mee siam during pss lecture... its really too nice to resist liao! Anyway, i think my classmates all did a good job today, i will never dare to present in front of so many people! Well done everyone, but i hope my own friends will win LOL.

2011-03-10T07:16:00.000-08:00

Just when i die die cannot take mc, i had to be so sick that i need to go home and rest. currently, watever that comes out from my nose or mouth are all yellow, its disgusting shit. and my fever just kept coming back, mother told me i bended myself into a ball shape when i was sleeping jus now cause i was shivering. doctor said this is weird, and i need to go for further tests if i still didnt get well.

pls pray for my health so that i can enjoy my holidays which is really coming so soon. meanwhile, i am meeting big boss to discuss a big project tmr, pls pray for me. thanks.

and i am really really a licensed pharmacist now. not bluff! not trainee!

2011-03-09T05:49:00.000-08:00

I am sick again. Down with very bad sore throat that I think I am really in great pain. And the nose prob is acting up again, I think most prob dun need to sleep tonight le. I really really feel like taking mc tmr, but boss today jus said in my face that there are people who always mc every few days, and he thought they are idiots.

I got to rush out a report by tmr night and ppt slides by friday morning. then, i got to rush my another project report by friday night. then, i got to do 90 prescriptions, 10 cases and 20 soaps by monday so that preceptor can sign ... omg this is tougher than before!

Yeah the end is near .... But so near yet so far.

2011-03-07T06:38:00.000-08:00

Finally, the 9 mths of the journey to the west came to an end. Am happy that I survived it, I think this can make up one of the hardest point in my whole life. I may not have gone through a lot in life yet, but I am certain this is one of the most torturous 9 months I ever had. At some points in my pre-reg, I was almost crying every night when I got home. Cause I hated work so much, and I dun know why I must make myself go through this. I dun know how I got through this, but I am happy again. And I found back the motivation again. And because of what I went through, I am sometimes more certain this is what I want. ^^

I thanked someone out there for always being there for me all these while. Always being there for my nonsense messages. You are someone I can relate my problems to, and someone I believe can be impartial. And someone I believe got time to listen to my problems. With your encouragement, going to work is much easier. I am grateful for all the help all these while and I will always remember it. :)

OH yeah, so my dear friends, I am free again! I am now a registered farmer! Even I cant believe this myself, but it is true! Woohooo!!! ^^

2011-03-05T07:16:00.000-08:00

Had a good break today! I pon the PSS session and slept till 10am plus! Thats life man! Then went to my nephew's one year old birthday party! He is a very cute baby. Today, I heard that my other nephew, who was just recently born, seemed to have eczema. :((( Can see alot of rash on his body, so sad. I hope as a farmer next time, I can help him more.

Anyone heard of Glee? Or am I the only one who haven heard of this hollywood thingy? Noob man!

People keep saying, dispensing is easyyyy and boring. I dun really agree with this, an outpatient pharmer is not easy at all. How to convince people to be compliant? How to make patients feel that the time they spent waiting for us at the farm is worthy? And this goes on ... This is exactly the reason I make my students believe why it is worthy to pay me to go for lessons, wahahahaha.

2011-03-04T06:36:00.001-08:00

I was graded as POOR in the communication section for my DI attachment, means below 50%. And for the other 3 sections, I got around 60% only. Am I really that lousy? :(

Or am I setting too high expectations for myself, that I always make myself upset.

Lousy day to end my lousy week. :(:(:(

2011-03-03T05:55:00.000-08:00

I am a hem.

Reading too much such books these few days, I feel lousy. First, I think I accomplished nothing in the 22 years of my life. Second, I think I am still so childish. Third, I think I am a burden to everyone, sometimes my friends too. I always make a fuss out of nothing and make everyone upset. :(

I am alright, I am just overly tired. I rushed my report last night, and was barely awake today.

I dun know if I should take a long break after pre-reg. But I am afraid I will get too bored. I really want to get my Dec holidays but dun know can anot. Haiz!

2011-03-02T06:45:00.000-08:00

I am so tired. My cough is still here, and actually it is not improving at all. I tried 6 bottles of cough syrup already, and started at the 7th one today. If things dun get better, I am gg to be very emo. :(

2011-03-01T07:56:00.000-08:00

because I know it too well.

2011-02-28T05:01:00.000-08:00

Attached to the big boss the next 2 weeks to learn how to do strategic planning. -.- So boss asked me and D what is wrong with the pond that was just bulit on top of the building. I tot it was damn nice. I told him risk of mosquitoes breeding, then he asked what else ... then i asked the platform beside the pond is too low, risk of people may fall into the pond while standing beside the pond. :(

Then he gave me a lame look and asked what else .. i wanted to say this is not a good spot to have a pond cause it was under the big sun, so hot! who will come to the pond right? But i decided to keep quiet in case he slap me.

so you guess what is the answer my boss looking for?

2011-02-27T06:47:00.000-08:00

In an emo emo mood cause of the hormones. :( Luckily I love my patients and thus my job, otherwise I think I will lead a very sad life if I would have to work like this and deal with such matters everyday. I got so many things to do every weekend yet I have to think of all th exams, assignments, projects .... And sth as irritating as getting the signatures for those prescriptions to file so that I can graduate. All these things keep bothering me. So anal policy!

I wondered if Menpa went for lan outing today. You guys know why I cant go? Cause I got exams this week and i really got to study, but I dun want to say that time cause I will be whiney again. I hope to as far as possible, stay less whiney this new year lol. Hope the outing was fun for everyone. ^^ Dont worry I am okay, I dun play lan anyway!

Hopefully, this will be the last few times I write such things on a weekend again. =)

2011-02-26T09:06:00.000-08:00

Sometimes there are things I want to tell people, but I dun know where to start. Why must I go through all these?

But I know I made the right choice.

2011-02-25T16:57:00.000-08:00

Sigh I haven started studying for my retail viva. Tell me how to pass? I need to pass this badly! Anyone got any nice OTC notes to lend me so that I can have a crash course on this area in 1 hours? LOL. I trade my POM notes for the crash course for competency exam?

Pre-reg offically coming to an end. Time to write about the nice memories of this 9-months Journey to the West. Everyday is an eventful day you know! :)

2011-02-25T04:04:00.000-08:00

I am such a bimbo. Not saying that I am pretty, but I am very brainless. >.<

Nursing a chronic cough now. On MC. :(

2011-02-23T14:59:00.000-08:00

Hello world, I went to bed at 830pm last night and slept for 10 hours! Can you see how tired I am from all the coughing? I am still sick, no I am never well ever since CNY. Drinking cough syrup every night doesnt help. Actually I always feel it is better after a night of sleep, I always got phlegm in the morning, though it is green, YUCKS. But then, a whole day of dispensing made me throat so painful and for someone who dun like to drink water, I think I refilled my bottle 4 times a day. But gosh, I cant take MC cause I like to dispense so much. >.<

But I really like to talk to some patients, I like to sell pharmacy medicine. Cause thats when interventions come in. I like to tell patients you must continue applying fungal cream for one more week otherwise it will come back. I dun like to sell Hydrocortisone cream when Eloment dun work for them, cause I dun see the point. I met a drug addict yesterday, and he was coughing like crazy, but I still didnt sell. >< Actually, I wanted to give in to him, but my supervisor said dun GIVE IN.

But I made a dispensing error yesterday. Stilnox 6.25mg and 12.5mg. Apparently the 12.5mg box looked like it was a new box which is not tampered at all, so I didnt check the inside. I only made sure the outside is 12.5mg. So this is an antidepressant, and the patient was agitated when I was dispensing, and later on, he came back scolding me that I made an expensive error. WHY? Cause it was the 6.25mg strip that was inside. >.< I was really shocked, and luckily he went off after I gave him the correct medicine. I am really traumatized, I realised I really need to check EVERY SINGLE thing. And a small mistake, I may appear on the newspaper, and my career is tarnished. >.<

2011-02-19T23:14:00.000-08:00

I am sick again. :(

I cant wait for the end of pre reg!

2011-02-17T08:06:00.001-08:00

I AM DAMN STRESSED OVER THE 2 VIVAS TMR! KILL ME!

2011-02-16T07:47:00.000-08:00

I wasnt in a really good mood these few days cause I am still coughing very badly (EMO!) and the workplace is in a mess and I am getting scolded everyday. It is very emoing, today someone looked at my name tag and told me I am the most not efficient person she ever met. OMG when i tell you what dumb thing she had done, then you tell me who is more not efficient. But I shall not say it cause I believe in karma. ><

Then, on my way home on the train, I met an old friend. A guy LOL. A long time since I last saw him, and was shocked to see him cause I was yawning in front of him few seconds ago. We started chatting and then he said lets go dinner. I dun know why, I got 3 vivas in the next 2 days, but I still said okay. Nah I dun like him, at that instance, I just said okay! So we went for dinner and then I felt so relieved after the meal. =) I think I need to meet more pp outside my workplace so that I wont emo or live in fear anymore.

I am not trying to say I like this guy. But I am just amazed how such an impromptu meal can turn out to be so perfect. I thank this old friend for taking out his time to eat with me, and I am damn impressed with his passion and hard work. It just came at the right time, and I met the right person. Often, we whine about how hard work is and how tired we are. But this friend of mine, he was very motivating and I feel very encouraged now!

But boy, I am dead for viva now. :(

And I must write here, happy birthday mh! You are the best gift in my jc years, hope you hv a good year ahead and do be happy! Love!:):)

2011-02-14T07:07:00.000-08:00

Today, I went for my interview. I was really nervous cause this is my first time meeting face to face with my big boss. But he sounded alright and we chatted on pretty well, it was like a conversation just btw us for the 30 mins plus interview and I sorta enjoyed it,I hope I get selected and they get me what I want. ;) If I get what I want this time, I think most prob I will stay there for a long time ....

Today is V day. So, early in the morning, one PT passed me one flower. AHHA every girl got it, it was bought by the guys in the pharmacy. Lucky D is on leave today otherwise he has to pay. O.O Really sweet of them, I am so cheapo, I get christmas and v day presents whenever I go but I didnt give anything in return muahahaha. >.<

And the last min dinner was great, again free food. HOHOHO.

And I hope to pass all my vivas! not in the mood to study cause it doesnt concern my acceptance into the hospital liao! I just want to pass! ^^

hope mh's mother gets well soon. be strong. :)

2011-02-11T21:15:00.001-08:00

I am still very sick cause I am still coughing and I feel as if the mucous lining at my esophagus area is tearing due to the chronic cough. Only on antibiotics and decongestant now. O.O Tell me how to heal faster can? Otherwise I will still be so noisy at work lol.

But I am really happy this week cause of something. YAYS. =)

Yesterday was our cny party which I and my colleagues spent so much of our time (even longer than studying for viva) preparing for! Glad it went well, I think we did a good job. But I was quite embarrassed cause I was caught by one of the VIP for looking so fascinated by the lion dance. Quite paiseh, but well .... I really think the lion dance was superb! And the food was great! And I won a can of sharks fins. :):)

Schedule next week: Monday interview, tuesday viva, wednesday viva, thurs BREAK, friday viva, next next mon ppt! WOOHOO HAPPY V DAY EVERYDAY IN ADVANCE! ^^ While I mug very hard to be a licensed farmer. And I am only starting now. oh my.

Oh ya, this week, I cabbed home everyday cause end work at 11 plus everyday. GOSH KILL ME. Anyway, the taxi driver always ask me if I am doctor. HELLO HOSPITAL DUN ONLY HAVE DOCTORS OKAY!

I really hope to go holiday after pre-reg haiz, very confused. >.< \

I cant wait for the end of pre reg. I can actually see the end already, oh my.

2011-02-08T07:59:00.000-08:00

I never felt so tired my whole life, and all the vivas and ppt have not even started. Staying back repeatedly for the cny party is quite funny sometimes cause the colleagues are funny, but it is sucking all my energy away. My fever is happening anytime now, was shocked when I realised i still got fever at staff clinic today. Why am I so nwa?????? EMO. :((((( And I got a terrible sore throat and dry cough which doesnt goes away and doctor insists a decongestant will help? So I got scolded when I told her I have been taking procodin for the last 1 week and now i am feeling really shagggeedddd.

4 vivas next week with ppt the following week! welcome to the climax of pre reg!

2011-02-06T07:47:00.001-08:00

Dun know that non marinated chicken can also taste so nice hee! ^.^

2011-02-04T06:04:00.000-08:00

New year visiting is never the same again when u grow up and everyone starts asking you when you are going to get attached ... esp when everyone is alr Married and i am supposed to be the next one, and my dear sis is alr happily attached. I am really happy with my life now though I do feel a bf will be good, but then that guy dun want to be my bf wad! :( I feel more irritated when relatives said they spot me outside with a guy and they were gossiping that they will help me keep it as a secret if I mind that much! Hello, how come you know I am attached when I myself dun know!

Are times so bad that you guys cant wait to see me get married so that you dun need to give me ang paos!

And I got this duper big pimple on the eyelid which is so gross and i quickly bought bb cream to try to salvage, end up the bb cream is so light my face appears so white! Argh and I lost terribly in the cards games.

Nothing is going right in my rabbit year, sigh!

2011-01-30T07:07:00.000-08:00

I think one thing I would never get used at work will be to eat alone. I feel that's something very sad cause there are so many people in the hospital, yet I cant find anyone to eat with. I remembered the first day when I am left to eat alone at work, I am at a loss cause I finished eating so fast then I dont know what to do next. Its getting better, now I go to the cardiac clinic to read newspapers. :) But maybe with time, it will get better and who knows one day, the phobia will be gone.

When someone of my age has already become a mother of 2, I am still so childish and not independent. I feel useless sometimes. Argh. :(((

2011-01-25T06:17:00.000-08:00

OMG I cant believe less than 8 weeks, I am getting registered as a pharmer. Gosh! >.<

2011-01-24T06:22:00.001-08:00

One of the best things i ever learnt in pre-reg is learning not to take things for granted. I tend to be a very whiny person last time. But recently, I think I have changed, though I still am a little emo lol. in fact, I think I am a very lucky girl. I have nice friends, and of cos one of the best mummies in the world. :)

2011-01-21T06:38:00.000-08:00

I think I am going to be psychotic one day. :(

2011-01-19T09:11:00.000-08:00

there are always some periods of the month when I always feel lousy and feels I am nasty to myself.

I feel bad for my dear family. They were not supportive of my OCIP initially due to the long hours and I always fell sick due to overwork, but I told them things will get better. Then FYP came, and I told them things will get better when I graduate. Then pre-reg! Tada! Tell me, when will all these end?

Today, when I answered for the test, I wondered why nth was allocated to family. :(

I always feel why I cant even manage simple things myself properly. Like confirm felling sick if I overwork for 3 to 4 days. I am nwa I really cannot believe it.

Need to camp at MRO next week .... :(:(

2011-01-16T00:18:00.001-08:00

I was trying to do some marketing at the supermarket just now but i got lost! and i dun know what cooking oil to buy! Damn lousy! Determined to learn more marketing/cooking after pre-reg!

2011-01-15T06:11:00.000-08:00

I think I am lousy haiz. :(

2011-01-09T04:40:00.000-08:00

In the 3 weeks in hospital when my grandfather was hospitalised, so many people passed away in that same ward. It is so emoing to know life is so fragile and it seems so easy to die. Cause you heard their family members asking the doctors to try their best. And for my grandfather, he is in so much pain and suffering sometimes. Life is so unfair isnt it.

I just had a great weekend though. met up with lab partner for chat, went to USS for photoshoot with colleagues(got fireworks!!!), then shopping today. Now, I got to write that antibiotics report! Life is really unfair!

2011-01-06T18:05:00.001-08:00

My rotation finally ended, and I am happy. It is just not a place for me. I may seem I am very confident, but I dont feel good giving answers I dun feel confident of. It get struck in my mind for so long and I dun like this feeling. I feel lousy cause I dun know how to use excel or do nice slides or write nicely, in the end I got into arguments or my partner has to redo for me. I feel bad about it but he thinks I dun feel anything. I am just not someone who can write well, and I dun think I blog well too. +.+ And there is minimum patient contact, I feel bored sometimes.

But I am glad its over! I learnt alot of interesting stuff though! =)

So glad tmr got PSS. It seems so long ever since the last time I see everyone again. :)

Finally, my grandfather is going home tmr! Discharge liao!!!!

Happy birthday YH! Working is never like studying, mistakes are bound to happen. Just need to learn from mistakes!:)

2011-01-04T05:59:00.000-08:00

Why is this world so complicated? DI questions are complicated, my korean show is complicated, the 9pm show is complicated, even my friends are getting more complicated! Help!

2011-01-03T05:03:00.000-08:00

I feel very thankful for whatver I have in my life. I have a loving family and great friends who never fail to help me or make me laugh even though I have a lot of stunts! >.<

Horrible monday blues during work today. DI is boring cause I can't open my mouth and gossip but can only msn or fb! And I got so much work to do! And the phone likes to ring when I am alone! And people from all over the place call and ask me for answers! Hohoho! Cool max! :)

2011-01-02T02:54:00.000-08:00

Had an awesome end to 2010. Went out with my taiwan gang, though char was absent. We first went 15 minutes, then to bugis arcade, then we drove to padang then we got off the car, then woohoo watched the fireworks from there! Then we went back to tampines for macdonalds then went to airport again! Thats when I got stomachache thanks to the mocha at mac, then i feel so tired and nwa, and I wanted to go home so badly HAHA. Thanks the guys for the awesome celebration, the best gift in 2010 was knowing the 2 of you. :)

In 2010, I ...

a) graduated from farm with 1st class. I still cant believe I got it sometimes, and I think my parents dun believe too lol. I am really proud I made them proud.
b) went to taiwan with cheryl babe and my 2 new friends for close to 3 weeks. Had fun, and I do hope the friendship remains
c) started pre-reg and my friends thought i was still studying cause i am still as busy and poor.
d) was damn emo cause my uncle passed away suddenly. i never forgot how he left us at the hospital's ICU, and till today, my heart squeezed when I go near that room.
e) had a hard time managing and coming to terms with 2 grandfather's conditions. I cant imagine why i cant help them at all.
f) started to give my parents a better life by bringing them out for more meals. I am very happy of this!
g) became more indepedent than ever cause my mother became the main caregiver for my grandfather and sister went to hall, most of the time, i am alone at home.
h) lost weight. Yeah! :D (how? i dun know why too)
i) became really emo sometimes cause i cant adapt to working life. and I miss my friends alot.
j) made new friends, and I hope i didnt lose my old friends. To my friends, though I didnt talk to you much nowadays, I really treasure you. Just like recently I saw those OCIP photos on fb, I really miss my cambodia DAD gang.

2010-12-29T07:00:00.001-08:00

I have been sick for the last few days, but I still went to work cause ..... Theres nobody at home anyway, it will be damn sad to be sick in an empty house. And at least when I faint at work, someone will know. o.o Feels really terrible, cause my nose feels blocked or runny at diff times and I lost appetite yet I still feel hungry. And I wore jacket with fans off at night, cause somehow the weather so cold these few nights??? And work hasn't been going smoothly ... IT NEVER RAINS BUT POURS! :(

Looking forward to the new year/christmas celebrations coming up though. Hope I get well soon! Sth good abt work is, I can go internet and thus I can msn and I think I finally got time to look through all the albums on facebook. :D

OH yeah I recevied 2 wedding invitations for march and april. Everyone getting married in 2011! Woosh!

2010-12-28T22:15:00.000-08:00

One day,I will ask myself again why you are treating me like that.

2010-12-28T07:36:00.000-08:00

I took 3 different antihistamines today and now I am in a super dazed state. ._.

2010-12-27T05:33:00.000-08:00

HEY I CARRRY TWO BNFS TODAY UNTIL MY HANDS WANNA BREAK.

TODAY I SOLO DRUG INFO AND I PICKED UP 13 CALLS! WELL DONE!

AND MY HAIR IS SO STRAIGHT UNTIL EVERYONE THINKS ITS WEIRD. WHYYY! :(

2010-12-26T03:29:00.001-08:00

Yay I just rebonded my hair! And I like it alot! Spent alot of money!!! But it is my christmas gift for myself yah! All ready for the meetups this week! Hurray!!!

Sat down for 4 hours plus! Now i got to chiong my project as my chief preceptor wants to see my results. Grrrr I hope nothing wrong comes out of it. >.<

Meeting Menpa on thursday. :):):)

2010-12-25T17:52:00.000-08:00

Been a long time since I am back again. The last week was crazy, my grandfather went into a critical stage (I shall not talk abt therapeutics here) and I went to sgh from work almost everyday anytime. I only told one friend actually cause I am tired of telling people and this has become more common and serious than ever. Unfortunately, I met my classmate at sgh. >.< And he happened to be PC HAHAH and we were smsing at that time!

I think the best christmas I had is he is getting well soon now though he still needs to be hospitalised. Someone needs to be at the bedside 24hrs and this is really a burden. OOPS. Sometimes I dun know if getting well is a good or bad thing for him.

Otherwise, I am fine. Merry christmas everyday. I sent the wrong christmas mesasage to some friends yesterday, damn embarrassing!

2010-12-20T07:16:00.001-08:00

Sigh sigh I am having diarrhea now, clear fluids all the way. Why does it comes back again? Depressed. :(

2010-12-18T06:14:00.000-08:00

Okay I got my bonus but I calculated wrongly and was so happy for one moment. But am still happy cause I thought it is only a few hundreds. Oh well, arranged to go shopping spree tmr liao! :)

My colleagues were discussing abt work-life balance today. I worked really like hell for the first 3 months in my Pre-reg and was really burnt out. I feel life is happier now even though i feel my learning pace is slowed down. Maybe I am jaded already, which is very sad. Anyway, I am glad my friends still remember me and meet me up for christmas. :D I am sorry for the various last mintue pangseh-ings and I am also very upset. I am sorry for always being late for dinners, I always think the bus is waiting at the bus stop for me. I am sorry for looking sian diao at gatherings cause I am really tired, and no matter how long I sleep, I am still tired cause my sleep is always disrupted by either cramps or irritating nose. I hope my friends dont sms me only when the hospital got into the headlines and they think I am the one. >.<

2010-12-17T15:06:00.000-08:00

i am born to be a pharmacist LOL. :):):):):)

2010-12-16T07:43:00.000-08:00

I got scolded again. I get scolded everywhere. But its okay today cause I am still in a good mood. It feels good too to have received a message at the end of the day to say jiayou. Thank you jiawei!:D

I stayed back 3 out of 4 nights this week. And I got to do vaccines tonight. Am shagged. :x

2010-12-15T06:57:00.000-08:00

These 2 days ever since the emo attack, I am in a very happy mood. The rotation is good, the place is good, the people there are nice(and one stay in my hometown somemore), and my partner is very nice to me. :):):) Feels that going to work feels lighter too! :D

But I am still not feeling very well. Esp last night, I was sneezing so much I got sore throat this morning. Feels terrible, cause I cant talk. Then, I got diarrhea! +.+ After constipating for 3 days!

Thanks to someone who is so childish, I lost one patient. >___<

2010-12-14T08:10:00.000-08:00

Today, we stayed back to practise singing christmas songs! And I turn out to be soprano, anyhow de! Dun laugh LOL! I used to be from choir (Dun laugh again!) in secondary school and once sang carols too hor! I somehow forgot my choir lessons le but it was the best cca to join since I got to know my best friend. :D

Today, i went to visit one patient who have long finished my project interview but she was like a friend to me so I kept in contact with her all this while. She was my first patient i recruited and i am very thankful she was very supportive of my boring project. Ever since she started on cetuximab ( cause that drug cause severe low magnesium levels) she is always admitted for electrolyte imbalances. i was there for her all along with her family members, but at some times she dun want to show her fear to her family so that they wont be worried, and she will tell me abt it. Recently, she went for an op cause of recurrent wound infection. She was in pain and for the first time, she cried in front of me. I was really scared at first cause I am worried people may think I make her cry and her husband wasnt there. I hold her hand and didnt say anything, cause I dun know what to say or do. I had to leave shortly after she stopped crying cause I got to work too.

I am proud to be her support for that few minutes(hopefully). I believe today will be one of the most memorable days of my 9 mths journey.

2010-12-13T05:10:00.000-08:00

Okay I shall not emo ya! At least I got bonus coming soon!! Since I really dun know alot of things, I should work harder ya!

I was emo-ing like shit this afternoon I went crazy I only ate half of my rice during lunch cause I was busy wondering why I am so lousy. Still wondering now LOL! So, I was really hungry and just had a damn full dinner! Told my friend I almost went into refeeding syndrome, he said I am very well-nourished in the first place! ARGH!

Tmr got to stay back to have carols lessons for christmas. Tell me something which pre-reg dun need to know how to do. +.+

You never know how important your message was to me. Even though it was less than 10 words.

2010-12-13T04:31:00.000-08:00

This is the second consecutive week a farmer had commented that i dun know enough. Am i that lousy? Maybe i expect too much, but I never feel so down my whole life. I couldn't hide my disappointment anymore I teared on the way out. I always excel in the things I do, except now. And the worse thing is, I tried really hard. It made me doubt my abilities!!!! I am tired of the never ending work and effort I need to put in. Suan le la! >.<

it is not anyone's fault. i am the fault. i am lousy. :(((

2010-12-10T21:17:00.001-08:00

Didnt go for pss lecture today. Down with fever. and i jus slept for 12 hours! I know it was coming, cause yesterday I got stomachache that feel like pancreatitis and I was burping nonstop. And the damn irritating headache. Actually I been popping panadol these few days too, sigh. :( Thanks fang for helping me sign.

Anyway, I am gg to give myself a break today even though i got so much things to do! The tot of that makes me sick again.

Met up with jw and fel yesterday for dinner. Simple and nice, ate ice cream too! ice cream makes me happy! And city hall change too much over the last few mths! Nowadays, I only got to monitor the progress at the circle line at kent ridge and the construction site at BV. ARGH.

Was told that the assignment we handed in previous day was lousy. Well well, I think pre-reg are always thought to be so smart that they know everything already. But if we are so smart, we wont be suffering for these 9 mths. Pre-reg is supposed to be a time for us to make mistakes and make from it right. It was a painful lesson learnt, cause we chionged like mad in the afternoon to rectify the mistake. D was in painful deep shit the whole afternoon. And my stomach hurt like crazy that time thanks to the crisis.

I am so glad I am going OP soon sometimes. Cause i suddenly feel so jaded and I hope I can find back my drive in OP. And I believe I can do so. :D

Jay choy is no longer No.1 in taiwan for cd sales anymore, replaced by that irritating pig. UNEXPLAINABLE MAN. DAMN.

2010-12-09T04:59:00.000-08:00

i have this terrible headache following me this week and have not been sleeping well thanks to my runny nose. Feeling very terrible cause i feel really lousy with the medicine and i have to walk all over the place for tpn rounds. feel really horrible cause i cant rest at all. i hate all this cause i cant function as i sleep the moment i reach home. my lab attachment is duper not productive and i got scolded today for not knowing enough.

the thing is, i feel very lonely sometimes cause i cant tell anyone how i feel. nobody is free or will listen anyway. when i am not feeling well, or even when i feel very stressed, i dont know who to confide in. I feel i am fighting the pre-reg war alone and sometimes i really feel like 9 mths is enough.

2010-12-07T05:37:00.001-08:00

Hello, am back and doing well! At lab these few days and rather boring. -.- Readings after readings, sometimes i don't even know if i know i am reading. Anyway, my PMS emo period is over and now I am very happy once again hee!

I got a christmas present today! First one! Now I gonna waste time doing that puzzle. ^.^

My new laptop ... trying to figure out how to use msn 2010. I know how to appear online to some people, but then how to appear offline to that person again ar? I am an idiot right. LOL.

Babe is here to join me this week at work. Too bad she is not at lab today, otherwise we can make cream tgt. Making cream is damn tiring, and can only make 10 percent excess. Almost dun have enough at the end! it is a pity we cant go work or go home tgt, but at least now she knows my eye candy in the hospital. >.<>

OH YAH, needs a menpa gathering soon! Too nwa to plan sometimes, but I will ya!

Sometimes I am really scared of talking about the past. I am glad I managed to open up abit today. Thank you for asking.

2010-12-01T05:12:00.001-08:00

cramps this afternoon was so painful i feel tears in my eyes. )))):

and so much work to do. and i dun like to do. and i feel so tired the last few days i slept at 11 cause it was the time of the mth! I woke up at 5am in shock the last 2 nights cause i haven read my enteral nutrition notes! Sigh sigh sigh i cant do it. i cant do it. i cant do it.

2010-11-30T07:11:00.000-08:00

I went to the neonatal ICU today. and i saw a pair of twins babies, and they weigh 800g only. Am sad to see them in this state, they looked too fragile to even be described in words. I really hope they make it through.

In lab now, been doing extem preparations these 2 days. the trainings in school are useless cause I can anyhow stir and make a mess out of the whole area. Now, people are going to drink the shlol's solution that i freshly made for them!

I miss the clean room.

And i am going to repeat what i say every entry. i am tired.

i want to go holiday no friends are free. it is sad, the reason last time is no money. now is no time. everyday i surf the website looking for cheap deals, but i am deceiving myself only cause i haven apply leave yet. =.=

2010-11-28T06:36:00.000-08:00

If I could have anything that I could buy off someone else with money, or even anything that existed in this world, what would I want?

I dont even know what I want.

And its sad, cause I dun know where to go from next. Well, people may say you are so good at ur clinical part, u are so hardworking! You should be clincial! Should I? I know how complacent I am, how not meticulous I am, how lazy I am actually compared to years ago. So yeah .... And the more I work, the more I know, the more I doubt my own abilities.

Urine test? The only urine test I had in school was my pharmacokinetics module, and we measured the half life and kinetics of paracetamol. it was lame, almost everyone fake their urine with chrysanthemum tea or other teas, and we brewed the samples in lab lol.

Okay this is in response to rx's entry, and I am feeling sad that I had to work tmr. Worked today even though it was a sunday. I hate sunday duties, how many times must i mention this!

should stop thinking so much and read up on tmr's rotation!

2010-11-28T04:44:00.000-08:00

YAY I bought a new laptop. Now it is so quiet I can hear me typing the keyboard. SHIOK!!

But that means I am broke. I shall eat more veg rice with more rice and less meat this month. Christmas is coming, time to meet up for meals = more money needed.

oh ya, i lost my uob atm password. now my card is retained by the machine. sad. :(

2010-11-24T08:44:00.000-08:00

Hello! I finished my first round of vivaS and I think I should be able to pass them all! Awesome! :D

I would never imagine myself to end up training in this hospital 2 years ago when i was trying hard to make it on time for 8am lecture. the past few mths have been crazy, i sleep and wake up at weird timings, and normally i meet the outside world in the weekends. weekdays are normally working till i die type.

i am grateful for the group of colleagues with me. Other than CY, I think I made 12 new friends this time. :) They are nice people and I am glad to have this in my learning journey, I learnt alot from everyone! I thank my partner for helping me queue up for coffee and understanding my erratic behavior. But sometimes I still dun understand his erratic behavior.

I am not someone who will tell u I am worried and scared, cause I don't want to add to people's burden. But I am actually really scared everyday cause I worry I will get into trouble and end up quarreling with people. It isnt easy, but I am glad I survived close to 4 mths of work! :D

I still dont know what I want in the future though. Sometimes as much as I want to help people and be a good pharmer, sometimes I thought I am more suitable for other jobs. >.< I hope I can come to a decision when the training ends!

2010-11-23T04:36:00.000-08:00

Work in the past 2 days haven been good. its pretty shitty.

yesterday, Hospital C called me. And its was the Head farmer. Actually she called me last week, created a hooha btw DI and lab cause she asked for a substitute for one eye drop for alkaline eye burns. I helped her search, and ended up niao by the lab farmer in my hospital for being nosey. But, this was her DRUG ENQUIRY. And I am just a small farmer, how to reject! So yesterday, she came back from leave and called me again to ask for alternatives! Cause apparently my answer to her that day was not good cause the alternative also not available lol! Lousy! Then, I looked for more studies then called the eye farmer in my hospital, told him abt this, told him what i had done and what the lab farmer tot alr, and guess what! He called the lab farmer to ask why we stopped producing the eye drops! Then, the lab farmer scolded me again and this time, she asked me if i am very free. Cause hospital C has thier own DI. I really feel like scolding back cause it is not my fault, and my DI farmer is not around, I have to make the decisions myself. =.=

Today, some irritating farmer called me to ask for one question. it is written everything in DIH, MIMS and PIL on this equation, yet he told me it is not correct! So i searched and found all similar data, and showed him. Then, he showed me one reference table he got and told me in front of everyone that I didnt search enough! Bloody hell! I seldom lose my cool in front my strangers but this time, I am mad angry. And guess what, I went to search all the articles to show him! Then I realised his reference table is wrong!

I am alr very stressed over viva. Not having enough quality sleep. And everyone I have to deal with these people who just piss me off.

2010-11-20T21:50:00.001-08:00

Going to have my practical viva tmr. Very scared cause those instructions for use dun make sense, I mean I never see those products before my whole life. How to counsel!!!! But in holiday mood le, haven start memorising anything yet. Think will panic attack tonight. X.X

the N peeps are planning to go to have indian VEG dinner after viva. Oh well, that place serves not bad food lah, but then I tot that is rather sad to celebrate end of viva. It is not that i dun like the food, I also got eat veg meals de ar. But I am worried that I will get stomachache after that, my lousy stomach. Sometimes I think I eat too much chicken rice from the staff canteen, I also get stomachache cause maybe too oily. But then again, my stomach can take watever amt of french fried and macdonalds. =.= But its okay, there's always loperamide!

My friend all cant believe I got 4 vivas to go! it is like taking 4 mods in NUS lah!

Looking forward to post-viva to go out and meet those that I miss! Esp those farm friends. =)

I am very happy that char is coming to N soon for attachment heh. Hope CL gets well soon from food poisoning. :)

2010-11-19T23:38:00.001-08:00

I feel depressed when i see the amt of work to do in the coming weeks. :(

2010-11-18T05:26:00.000-08:00

I passed my inpatient viva! Awesome shit! Initially i was so nervous i cant even remember the dosing for Flumucil for PCI. LOL. I told them I am really nervous cause this is my first viva lol. in the end, i asked them .. have i passed alr? Because I want to go toliet very badly!

Oh but i need my fairy godmother for tmr's viva! :(((((

on my way to work today, i saw someone who look so similar to rx. I can totally still remember how he looked 4 years ago lol. I wonder if he look the same now. I miss menpa! Work hard for ur exams guys then we can hae a white christmas! ^.^

2010-11-17T04:25:00.000-08:00

Today is PH. Finally can sit down and have some good msn chats. Took a rather long nap by accident, but studying was rather productive. I cant remember them man!

I am looking forward to post-viva as I can finally do what I want to do. Currently on a hiatus and seriously this sucks cause I dun know if i can make it for tmr and friday. Am okay with retaking but pls dun let me retake everything!

2010-11-16T04:40:00.000-08:00

First day at DI. And alone! And some of the colleagues had their DI viva today! Damn terrifying!

Looking forward to end of viva so that I can buy my iphone then I can play non-stop those games! Mad in love with them! :D

I am feeling so sleepy now but I shall endure otherwise i will die in my cc viva ......

I want to be encouraging for my friends. But when they didnt do well, I feel bad cause I feel I give them false hopes. Sorry. :(

2010-11-15T06:00:00.000-08:00

I am so concerned over my high BMI that i wrote in my slides that chemo drugs r dosed based on BMI, not BSA! OMG, this is such a terribly funny mistake! So, stop saying that am fat okay! I cant conc at work!

last night around 1am, i realised i dun have enough info for my slides for ppt today and i am presenting to my chief p. call me kiasu or kiasi or whatever, i woke up at 630 to cab to work to use IPHARM in the wards. this is so damn tiring, i slept in the office and then jus now 2 hours at home. when you are tired, you inevitably emo and wonder why you are working so hard for. why i cant be my other friends and have their weekends purely to go out. i am trying very hard to have good balance, and it is so tiring to try that hard. cause there is really ALOT of things to do, and yet i want to go out during the weekends. you see, the learning log and project that i have to deal with after my exams ..... I jus hate them! sometimes i feel really bad i have ignored my parents ever since i starte working, i am really sorry for this and i am really trying very hard. Cause most of the time, I came home and went to bed straight. Or I wake up at timings they are deep asleep. i hope all these get better after my training, otherwise maybe this is just not for me.

2010-11-14T00:51:00.001-08:00

mugging (defined as intensive studying and brainless memorising) makes me emo. so many things to read! :((((

2010-11-12T07:52:00.000-08:00

I cant believe I am sitting for my viva soon, and soon I will be a real farmer! :D

This week was really bad. Supposed to be at purchasing, which was rather slack, ended up in retail pharmacy to pack. I feel unappreciated over there, alone and emo. I pity those farmers who are busy chasing after waiting time and getting scolded for no reasons. that day, i got scolded by a wheelchair patient cause i told him to wait 30 mins more as i need to go store and take stocks for him. he said his taxi fare will increase if he wait for me, but then the peak period for surcharge is not so early what. i hate such people who abuse ur special privileges! :(

then i was always left alone in store to do packing. cause my parnter and i take turns to go retail pharmacy to do packing. stock items are so heavy, i do until i sweat in the air con store. i hate this!

Got sth not good for my appraisal. well well, i promised someone i will get over it hee. :) like i always say, i dun expect everyone to like me. :)

2010-11-11T05:41:00.000-08:00

I am not a believer of staying up late (except to watch drama or chat haha) or doing last minute stuff. i think there is a reason why there is 24 hours a day, and a reason why people say we should sleep 8 hours a day. I am kinda upset by the end of the week nowadays if i dun get my 8 hours sleep, and i ended up spending my weekends sleeping away.

Now, i hv this lasting eye bags which i believed is due to the cc attachment, damn disgusting! I hope my eye masks will relieve it away!

Random post above oh!

2010-11-10T05:15:00.000-08:00

My viva is coming real soon, and i am going to die cause everything is in a mess. i really dun know where to start! The last few nights, i started reading the junk of stuff i wrote in the last few mths and i got difficulty recalling why i wrote those stuff and what they mean!

I am so tired. i often wonder why i am always so tired. i am at purchasing now, but i am still tired. no matter what i do, i am still tired. I rested alot like during the weekend! Am sad. :(

And i got to do the slides for my cancer centre ppt. I hate doing slides!

2010-11-08T07:00:00.000-08:00

after a bad night of never ending bad news followed by sleepless night due to my nose, i received good news this evening! My cousin is a father now! Woah! :) :)

I need to learn to be more humble ... ^.^

2010-11-07T06:49:00.000-08:00

i spent my whole morning trying to hunt down one lizard in my room. it is damn huge. and there are so many notes in my room, so many good hiding places! :(((((